In His Likeness
by amor-remanet
Summary: Bring Your Kids To Work Day in the Garden of Eden.


"Gimme that!" Lucifer whined, making a grab for his older brother's sword.

"It's not yours," Michael snapped. With a huff, Michael spread his wings and took off at a breakneck speed, swooping through Eden, ducking around the plants and animals, leading Lucifer all across the hills and valleys. Although Michael had stronger wings and had been flying longer, Lucifer managed to keep up more than well enough, even getting his hand on Michael's ankle a few times.

He smiled and shook His head affectionately, but a quick glance at Adam and Lilith suggested that they did not find this nearly so amusing as He did. Adam furrowed his brow and sat below a tree, beckoning for Lilith to come and join him. Raphael came to Adam first, though, dragging the baby Gabriel with him. Entirely without regard for her, Raphael nestled in next to him and started telling Adam everything he could mispronounce about how angels worked and about his little brothers and sisters.

"An' there's Uriel, an' Anael, an' Bar-ack-eel, an' Castiel…" Raphael explains, "an' I don't like Castiel, he's stupid."

"…Well, what makes him stupid?" Adam asked, visibly unsure of what else to do.

"He's just stupid!" Raphael snaps, rolling his eyes. "He's always like, 'Why can't I see Dad,' an' 'Uriel's an' Anna's not behavin' right,' an' 'I don't wanna hug the cupids'…" From nowhere, an apple appeared above Raphael's head and hovered there; looking suspiciously innocent, Gabriel sat off to the side, gumming on a little red ring. Raphael continued, entirely unaware of this, "even though everybody knows that you hug the cupids or they get mad," an' I don't like him because he's — HEY!"

The apple dropped on Raphael's head; Gabriel's entire face lit up and he squealed in high-pitched delight. Gumming on his ring again, he looked up at the space above Raphael's head intently. Another apple appeared and, as its predecessor, dropped onto Raphael's head.

"OW!" Raphael shouted. This process repeated again; he glared at his little brother. "Gabriel! Stop it!" Gabriel slid the ring out of his mouth. This time, a squash fell on Raphael's head. "I SAID STOP!"

Gabriel said nothing, but arched his eyebrows as if to ask, Who? Me? Raphael glowered, but, when nothing else happened, he returned to informing Adam of angelic goings on: "Like, yesterday, it was dinner time, an' Michael an' me just wanted to eat, but stupid Castiel was like, 'rah blah blah, we're angels, we don't need to eat, and I'm a big, stupid dummy'—"

He was cut off by the sound of a watermelon falling on him and falling open.

Things went quiet, far too much so… and then: "DAAAAAAAD!" Raphael groaned. "GABRIEL WON'T LEAVE ME ALOOOOOOOONE!"

He shrugged His shoulders and turned to Lilith with a smile. She gave Him a look of disbelief. "…Aren't You going to do anything about that?" she asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Not really," He said. "I'm of the belief that kids need to just be kids, so they learn how to settle problems on their own, you know?"

A tint of horror crossed her eyes. "And You're not worried about them killing each other? …Wait, these…" She cut herself off and sighed. "Adam's been talking about trying to have kids, You know… being fruitful and multiplying, like You said to do. Please, please tell me that they aren't going to be anything like this."

"Well… I mean, I could, but it'd be a lie."

Lilith stared at Him for a moment, then said, "I… I think I'm going to go check on the, erm. …On the horses."

Lilith did not go to check on the horses. As far as she was concerned, those irritating beasts of burden were nothing more than a constant pain in her ass, and if she could have picked any species to be wiped out of the Garden forever, it would have been them. The only things that were more trouble for less worth were those stupid, miniature God-children known as angels.

Pausing with a sigh, Lilith stared out at the Garden, at the different enclaves of blooming flora, at the groups of animals eating their fill. There was a pop, and suddenly, it felt like something was cleaving to her leg. Lilith looked down into the face of the angel known as Lucifer.

"Miss Lilith?" he asked over-sweetly, staring up at him with the biggest, bluest eyes she'd ever seen. "Will you come and help me with something?"


End file.
